Tuesday, July 30, 2013

It has truly been a while...

I miss writing in this blog. I almost forgot I had it. I have been really busy lately and new people have stepped into my life. It's been a good few months since I have posted here. I graduated with my B.A. in Studio Arts. I have been touting that around for a while now trying to find a decent job so that I can go back to school. I plan on taking a few classes to prepare myself for a master's degree or possibly medical school. Who knows? Only God knows :) He will guide me to the right path, I'm sure...as I seek for His answers.

I helped baptized a new person at my church with God's approval, of course, and I have finally gotten over the guy I had a huge crush on. He is dating now and I am going to say, long story short, God has closed that door physically and in my heart. I was sad but I am not sad anymore. I feel a lot better now. All I can say is, God helped me through it. HE DID. No lies. When you, in your heart, do right by God and do your best to do right by others (even when they constantly hurt you), God will provide ways to settle your heart and bring you peace.  I have peace. Thank God. I hope that the guy I liked has peace, too.

What has God been teaching me lately? Well, an age old lesson that I think I will have to be taught over and over again. BE HUMBLE. Ha. I have to be humble. I have to live with intention. I have to live to bring glory to my Father's name. I must remember where I come from and what I really am. I was born a sinner and I am now a redeemed sinner. Saved by grace but still capable of many wrongs. I am not the one who is in control of what I get but God is. It's not about how I look, it's not about how I act, it's not even about what I try to make happen. God...is...in...complete...control. There you have it. I have been humbled in my heart and in my spirit. I have been humbled in ways that one might find painful...but although it may be somewhat painful, I see the purpose and need of it so I don't mind so much.

I have things I need to do, people I need to encourage, dairy products I need to avoid (weird...just ask if you wanna know), and a many more things in this life I must live. I can't quit now; although, I want to. I can't deny it. Just today I told my mom I feel like the whole world is against me. It is...and sometimes it makes me want to disappear...but God isn't...that's my only comfort.

Psalm 18:27 "You save the humble but bring low those whose eyes are haughty."


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